I went through something similar in my mid twenties. Knowing I was still a Witch and had my feet firmly planted on the Pagan Path, but also knowing I needed to veer and take a different direction. We all know we're a bit different even in our childhood and we search for the path from an early age....I was five, watching an episode of a show called In Search Of and watched the initiation of Penny Cabot and I knew, that's where I wanted to be. Fast forward to the age of sixteen and finding out that, yes, there are real witches out there and I worked with two of them! Unfortunately, they were not very friendly women and told me to check out the book store for books on witchcraft if I wanted to learn. So, I did. It was not always easy sneaking said books, (sometimes hidden under my shirt), into my Roman Catholic parents home, or being accused of smoking marijuana because I was performing candle magick in the late hours of the night and my mother could smell the smoke when I blew it out, and most tools were out of the question. Although, when I was nineteen, I discovered an awesome little shop in Riverside California called Dragonmarsh, (it's still there if you're in the area), and started stocking up on herbs and a black mirror.
In my mid twenties, I was a single Mom and was part of a local Wiccan Church, (you've heard me talk about my friends on air), but something wasn't clicking anymore for me. I wanted more, I wanted to stretch my magickal wings, I was frustrated....so I stepped away for a little while. I think all witches go through this at some point and I think it's just part of growing. I came back, but decided Wicca wasn't for me and became pretty much a Kitchen Witch.
Now I am in my early forties and going through a similar situation, but am not panicking and not even remotely thinking of stepping away. I am not sure if this is a growing, dormant or metamorphosis period, but I'm looking forward to finding out. Everything has kind of shut down for the Summer.....writing, reading, casting, even listening to music. It may be a mild depression due to some major life changes. Depression doesn't necessarily mean that I'm sad, I'm actually quite happy, I feel stronger than I have in a very long time. I just feel reflective and unmotivated, but I'm going to be okay. I know that because I have lived through worse, I have an amazing network of friends and family. I'm just going with the flow until the Gods tell me it's time to wake up.
Bright Blessings to you all!